Monday, 22 April 2013

Suffering own demons

            I have many demons inside me which makes me what I am, along with the angels. I thought I had control over my demons but this irresistible force comes to me when I am weak. Demons feed on our weakness and make us weaker. Waiting to be released, angels lying in a closed beaker. Demons have taken control over them now. What happens to the Angels will be decided by the power of heart, the will to stand against the demons. Will there ever be a revelation? Complete annihilation of demons. Or will I be destroyed in this complete annihilation? The question no one can answer. All I can do is suffer my own demons and find the way to fight them. The struggle is long and hard but one who walks on the broken glasses can understand the true softness of sand. In reality glass is created by the fire between the sands. Truth is always in front of us but we choose to look behind.

Monday, 15 April 2013

Mind vs Matter

Attachment good or bad? A question that has been troubling many religions. We all had experiences of attachment in our life. But mine is weird though, can't make sense of it. A little while back I was in a place away from everyone I knew, miles from my comfort. I hated every moment of it, every hour, use to count my days backwards to when I ll leave this place and get back with my daily schedule and with all my life's comfort and privileges.  But some part of me wanted to miss that place, didn't want to leave. The final day of exile as I would say; I was back communicating with strangers, thinking the days are over and I'm done with this. Fact is, that I have completed my 12 days of staying away from my comfort,  but when I am leaving which I wanted to from day one, I am getting this  home sick feeling that l'm going to miss this place. All the time I had there, with myself, just me and my mind and no one else existed. I was lonely but calm. I wasn't comfortable but I was at peace. Mind was seeking for peace which I got there; peace of almost nothingness. 
In his entire life span a man can want many things money, car, lavish home and power but in the end it's the peace of mind that they seek. Peace cannot be bought by money, found by power or by helping needy. It can be attained by  knowing  mind , body, nature and time. Knowing self is always the first step and the last step. But from the day we are born we try to figure out the world and its aspects. Finding self is like finding god. God needs to be found and respected. So find yourself and respect it. The peace will be found or peace will find you.
Here I am back with all my family, friends and acquaintances talking, trying to figure out my career and my future. But my present is worried , restless, once again needs to feel my mind. The mind who has been confusing me all my life. There is an answer in this confusion which I haven't figured out yet. But soon will, till then it's just an unanswered mind trying to communicate with me in all sorts of language which  I don't understand yet.

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I'm writing just to let you know that I'm still Alive!